Children - between cruelty and honesty

A lot of people say that children can be extremely cruel. Indeed, it is a terrible thing when children are bullying one another. Often there is one child that is “different” and therefore it is being bullied. I think these bullies don’t even know what harm they inflict upon their victim. These children may be marked for the rest of their lives.  
But who should we blame? Is it the parents’ fault, because they have failed in their education? Is it society’s fault? Or is there no one else to blame but the children?

I do not know the answer to that question.

At the same time, children are usually such honest little beings. I have assisted as a coach for some years and I have made so many wonderful experiences there. You soon learn that you are not only the children’s coach, but also their attachment figure, their role model, their friend and sometimes even their psychologist. They tell you about school, their family, their friends, their problems and what makes them happy. It is amazing how much responsibility you already have for them, although just seeing them at most once or twice a week for two hours.

Of course, you need to keep some distance though.

Even their parents talk to you about their children’s problems and want some advice. Considering that I am not a mother and that I had so many problems with my own family, it was actually a strange thing to do.

Do you know that big, sincere happy smile that only a child can give you? And do you know these things only children seem to recognize? There were actually two children that told me I had pretty teeth. Who looks at the teeth of another person? Moreover, I think my teeth are just very ordinary. But it made me laugh, it was such a sweet compliment. I particularly appreciate compliments from children, because they usually just say what they see and you can be sure that they don’t tell you because they expect something in return.

I moved away from my home town a year ago, so I wasn’t able to coach them anymore. I had to promise to visit them regularly and one little girl even cried. It touched my heart, they were so sweet.

Can there be anything more heart-warming than little children that are all excited and happy, just because you visit them? They are lovely little creatures.

Anyway, what I wanted to get at is that children are often so much more honest than adults. But at the same time they can be so cruel. But are they really? Aren’t adults crueler sometimes? There are so much terrible things in this world that only adults are able to commit. Children are extremely straightforward and just tell what is in their mind, which can be a good but also a bad thing. In contrast, adults can be very furtive, which isn’t a good thing either, or is it worse?

On the other hand, when I don’t like someone I try to avoid him but not to bully him. That is maybe something that only adults do.

So are they cruel or just honest? Or are they both? And what about us? Are we better, after all?